WWTCD-what would tom cruise do?

NEWSWEEK reported that a 40-year-old single woman was "more likely to be killed by a terrorist" than to ever marry.And a quick pause while I take my 10mg of Lexapro. As the day started off with a quick sniffle, sneeze and smoker's cough, I think to myself I am SICK- it has been a 12 days since my last visit with Mcdreamy-hell i have nothing on my schedule today. A quick visit to the doctor's office never hurt anyone-hell they dont even charge me co-pays anymore...i have nothing better to do than to talk about my ailments. As he comes in the room -takes a quick look at me and says"huh you don't look good, your usual luster is gone" NO shit sherlock, how many years of med school did it take to make that deductive reasoning statement? So we start on the symptoms and signs, I state the facts and make it quick! Yeah, he writes down nothing in his little notified and then starts in on " are you having suicidal thoughts-homicidal thoughts are Ok, as he chuckles-I give him the eye, are you kidding me you fellowship tithing online, Boston market loving jerk off, HOMICIDAL? Huh....Let me get my little book out, spin that wheel and give you a list!As we CUT BACK TO THE OFFICE VISIT: the drag diagnosis, sinus infection, even though my ear is hurting , there is no infection of course not, and the great big diagnosis is : DEPRESSION-here is a little pill that will make you feel better. Hey, i am all about a mood lifter/elevator/ mothers little helper. BUT... Is this it? So all my problems are mental .. YEAH note to friends-we all know i am a little off, but really is this it? So in 6 weeks I am supposed to check back with him. And the worst part of it all was i knew exactly what psych exam he was doing and I knew how to answer the questions! And those whores in the office are going to have to code that, so they are all going to know and That so will be in my permanent record!On a side note, Now that Mcdreamy knows I am Diagnosed with being craze , he is so never going to Marry me! As i left he awkwardly patted me on the back and told me that I was going to be OK! Vomit really did come up in my throat at that moment in time....As i drive home from my totally surreal moment in the doctor's office, i think of the humor in all this--THE ONLY THING THAT IS KEEPING MY GOING AT THIS TIME--gee, I wonder what Tom Cruise would say about this?
My other thing is i just googled lexapro and the web site is down? Great,,, make sure i keep my receipt.....And this all goes full circle to the janky pharmaceutical reps! FIST is all i have to say!
And here are the TV reviews:
Supergroup-wow all i can say is FIST! The quote of week goes to Mr. Ted Nugent "THE CUTER THE CRITTER, THE SWEETER THE MEAT" That definitely needs to be on a T-shirt! This show is so good, I was mesmorized, i need 24 hour live feed on Sebastian Bach! Unbelievable
Real world/fresh meat challenge- ohmygawd this is a train wreck but yet so compelling..i must have more. This is going to be a great season.
So what else is coming up? We have My fair Brady-a must see, hell's kitchen is starting June 12. Summer is going to be great for viewing pleasure! I will fake my tan, take my little sunshine pill and feel so much better about myself after watching these people on TV.
One more thing for all my friends out there....I need to be in the Pillsbury bake off- they pay 1 million dollars for the best recipe...I have one year...So i need recipes! And I am all about the gimmick-next time you are grocery shopping or cooking at the house and you see some contest on the box or package, give it to me! I could so come up with a crafty little jingle and I sure has hell can come up with some great recipe. It is going to my claim to fame! I am out! FIST! SNACKBOX!